Happy New Year!

It's New year's Eve and I hope each and every one of you has a safe, fun and memorable celebration.

Sometimes we make beginning a new year very hard on ourselves. We pledge to make numerous changes in our lives, to lose those extra pounds, to get that promotion, to take that trip we've been planning for years. We swear that this year will be different than the rest, better than before. It doesn't matter that we've made these promises to ourselves for years now; somehow we believe that this year will be different.

And yet somehow it isn't. Why is that? Because:

1) We have too many goals. Change is hard, so trying to change multiple facets of your life all at once is extremely difficult. Prioritize your goals and work on one or two at a time. The others will keep for another day.

2) Our goals are unreasonable. I don't care how much you love horses, if you are a 6 foot tall, 250lb. man, you are not going to be a jockey. Don't give up on your dreams, simply put aside unattainable goals and work on those you have a real chance of achieving.

3) We don't have a plan of action to achieve our goals. You need to map out a plan for reaching your goals on a day-by-day, week-by-week, month-by-month schedule, with firm dates for reaching your goals and milestones to mark your progress.

This year I plan to put these three steps into action. This year I will succeed, because I will follow a plan for focusing my energy on accomplishing what I need to do in order to reach my goals.

May you reach your goals in 2009! Happy New Year!

Stress-Free Holiday

Okay, okay, there is probably no such thing as a stress-free holiday, simply because we insist on packing so much activity into such a short time. Shopping, baking, cleaning, mailing packages, writing Christmas cards, entertaining, attending parties. Whew! It's enough to make anyone dizzy. So, if we can't elimiate stress entirely, here are five ways to reduce stress during the holidays.

1) Make a plan. Instead of running around to several different stores, decide what you're shopping for and where best to find it, then head out. Try to stick to one geographical area at a time - the mall on Friday night, the local shopping center on Sat., etc.

2) Shop during off hours if possible. Take an early lunch one day and get a few things done, or come into work extra early and take off at three. Of course, it helps to have a flexible work schedule and an understanding boss. If you can't swing that, several stores open as early as 7:00 or 8:00 a.m. on weekends and stay open late during the holidays.

3) If you do get stuck in a long line, take a deep breath. Try to use the time productively. Enjoy the lovely music, think of the fun you're going to have with your kids, reminisce about your favorite Christmas, people watch. You're stuck in line anyway, why be miserable? Same thing goes for the cookies that burn or the gelatin that won't set. Don't sweat the small stuff and lose sight of the important stuff.

4) Prioritize. As the holiday draws nearer, you may not be able to get everything on your list done. Decide which items must be done and focus on those. Christmas will still come if you don't get every decoration up or make that extra batch of fudge.

5) Remember why we're celebrating. It should be a time of joy, of love, of opening our hearts to those around us. Don't let little things get you down. Enjoy the time we are given to spend with our loved ones. It's priceless.

The Joy of Writing

As promised, I said I would write about the joy of writing, so I will.

If you've ever experienced putting words together in a way that perfectly conveys your feelings, then you know the joy of writing.

If you've ever written something that evokes strong emotions, then you have learned how to use the written word to make a connection with another person.

If you've ever made an argument on paper that is so persuasive that it forces another to examine his or her views, then you understand the power of the written word.

If you feel compelled to write even if no one else ever sees your words, simply for the fulfillment it brings to you and you alone, then you are a writer.

Success!

It's November 30th and I just uploaded my novel to the NaNoWriMo website. It totals 50,544 words. Yippee! Anyone who completes over 50,000 words is a winner, whether the novel is completely finished or not. I still have a couple of chapters to write to move into the final dramatic conclusion (which is already written!), so I'm almost there.

Of course, after I finish the first draft, I get to start in on the revisions, so there is still a lot of work to do. However, I'm happy to have gotten this far and feel I have ample cause to celebrate. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Follow Your Dreams

I haven't updated my blog for some time. That's because I've been busy completing a project that I began last spring. I'm writing a mystery novel. It's something I have always wanted to do, and so I am finally doing it.

I have a tendency to begin projects and never quite complete them. Some simply must get finished, and somehow I manage to get through them. Others are easier to put off. Writing a novel falls into the latter category for several reasons.

1) It's just plain scary. You're putting something you have created, something that is a part of you out there for the whole world to see - and judge. And they don't call them critics for nothing.

2) It's hard. Let's face it. Writing is hard work. It is all consuming as the characters occupy your mind day and night. You have to sit down in front of a blank page or screen and start writing, even if you haven't got an idea of where you're headed with that scene. You agonize over finding the right word, only to scrap that sentence, paragraph or entire page the next day when you reread your work.

3) It takes a long time. You can't write a novel in a short amount of time. It takes months to plan it out and months to write it and months to rewrite it. Even though I'm writing like the wind for National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), I began thinking about this book a long time ago, and there will be many edits before the final draft is complete.

4) It may never be published. Book publishing is a business and editors won't buy a book unless they believe it will sell many copies. That makes it harder to break into the business, but it doesn't make the effort of writing the book any less worthwhile.

Next blog - the Joys of Writing a Novel

The Power Within

"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when we bring what is within us out into the world, miracles happen." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What a beautiful quote and how important it is that we believe this and that we teach our children to believe it as well. We all have tremendous strength within us. We learn to cope with grief, loss, illness and disappointment. We pick ourselves up and carry on, ready to face a new day.

In addition to our inherent strength, we are all blessed with unique, individual talents. When we put aside our fears and our embarrassment, we allow our innate gifts to shine forth. Encourage your children to take risks, to reveal their gifts to the world and leave the world a better place for having done so. Have a wonderful day!

Moving Forward - Things are Different Now

We had a special treat this weekend. Both kids were home from college to help my mom celebrate her 83rd birthday. It seemed like old times with the entire family together, but it was different. Brian could only stay one night; he had to be back on Sat. to work on a group project with some friends. Katie wanted to earn some money babysitting and she needed to get together with a high school buddy. Eric, as usual, was busy with his friends, and spent a big chunk of the weekend playing football.

And so, the times have changed. Once your kids grow up and leave home, the dynamics are never quite the same again. They have their own lives and their own set of priorities, just as we did when we were that age. We can either feel sad and mourn the loss of that family togetherness, or we can recognize how very lucky we were to have had those times together and look forward to the future visits we will have. Me? I'm going to do the latter.